In this book by former Nebraska and Carolina Panther defensive lineman Jason Peter about his journey to heroine addiction and back to sobriety, Peter is candid about the life he lived, the drugs he used, the pain 
he caused his family and the struggle to become a productive member of society again. If books had a rating system like the movies do, this book would be rated R, and a strong R at that.
Peter begins his story briefly in high school, explaining that he was somewhat of a late bloomer, not playing football until he was a Junior in high school. He became convinced that he wanted to play ball for Nebraska like his older brother, but starting football so late left Peter with no scholarship to Nebraska. To solve this problem, Jason retook his senior year at Milford Acadmy in Connecticut after failing his senior year in high school in New Jersey. The extra year got Peter noticed, and he won the scholarship to Nebraska. Peter then retold how much of a rush it was to be a member of the Nebraska football team in the mid 1990′s when the Cornhuskers were such a dominant team. The rock star like status the players enjoyed nurtured Peter’s addiction to the rush of playing the game and being cheered by 78,000 fans at Memorial Stadium in Lincoln. He also introduces the readers to his friendship with Grant Wistrom. Together, the two of them formed a force on the defensive line for the Huskers and became 1st round draft choices in the NFL after winning the national title their senior season.
After being drafted by the Carolina Panthers, Peter endured a change in culture which caused him some loneliness. Playing with players who were much older in some cases and men who had already started families left Peter with few people he could call good friends. He reveals the friendship he had with two players, one in which he partied, and one in which he was mentored. While in Carolina, Peter struggled with injuries. He was having multiple surgeries every year on his neck and shoulders. He played in pain, and ultimately his career was shortened. While struggling with the injuries, Peter learned to get by on strong pain medication which he had access to. He discovered that the pills took away the pain, not just the physical pain, but the emotional pain as well.
After his career was cut short by injuries, Peter began the long descent into his darkness and addiction. Ultimately, Peter entered rehab multiple times before he finally found a solution that worked best for him. This is a testament to the truth that healing is not a “one size fits all.” And, Peter knew that, and, despite his continued abuse of drugs, searched until he found the right solution. Today, Peter is sober and working as co-host of The Spread, a show on ESPN radio in Lincoln, NE. He is married, and he attributes much of his sobriety to the love of his wife. Peter is also a shell of his former self which at one time was about 6-4 and 285 lbs falling all the way to 225 lbs.
I admit it, I was hoping for something else in this book. I new that Peter was now sober. I was hoping he would attribute it to the Twelve Steps or faith in God or a relationship with Jesus or something like that. The reality is that some people beat addiction without using the means we would have liked. In the end, Peter did not hold out any nuggets of wisdom to others who struggle with addiction, he simply told his story and how he was able to come clean. He dismissed much of the popular ways of dealing with addiction as not being right for him. I respect that.
The book read like he was telling his story in a locker room full of guys, which makes sense because he spent so much time there. The language was, at times, graphic and brutally honest. He recounts his anger with former Notre Dame Lou Holtz (p. 35) for the way he failed to care about his younger brother, an Irish recruit who was paralyzed in a freak simming accident. He does not give out grand platitudes for others to take into their lives to become better people. I would have preferred that, but that was not his style. His story does serve as an inspiration to others in that he was able to find a way to become sober. Indeed, the love of his family is the driving force behind his sobriety.
I want to say thanks da Wiz for letting me know about this book. I am happy to have gotten the book on its release date and be able to read within a couple of weeks. Next up on my list is Season of Life: A Football Star, a Boy, a Journey to Manhood
